Salutations™!!
I’m apologizing that this post is a) late and b) short. I was still getting acclimated to being back today, Dear Reader. But, whilst I’m sitting here doing my social media posts, and finally fixing my Fire TV, I turned to watching crappy films, as has become the custom for me. This one is from 1977 and I’m really only about 15 minutes into it. But, I chose it because I was caught by the tagline: The Only Thing More Terrifying Than the Last 12 Minutes of This Film are the First 92.

It is called Suspiria and is an Italian film but it is overdubbed. It’s clearly crappy 1970s horror with bright red blood, fake looking organs (a heart comes to mind) and bad effects. But, it made me chuckle already so… And, to top it off, it was remade and will be released in November of this year. It is an American film this time starring Dakota Johnson, Tilda Swinton and Chloë Grace Moretz. And, it’s a true remake, as far as I can tell. I had its debut at the Venice Film Festival on Saturday. Oddly enough, it’s rated 7.5 stars out of 10 on IMDb. The remake has already made it to only 6.x something. And, Rotten Tomatoes has it at 92% Fresh and an Audience Score of 83%. Perhaps it gets better? We’ll see.
Anyway, the plot summary, per my media player, is this: “From the moment she arrives in Friedberg, Germany to attend the prestigious Tans Academy, American ballet-dancer, Suzy Bannion senses that something horribly evil lurks within the walls of the age-old institution.”
Doesn’t that sound lovely? Pffft. It’s entertaining, though. I’m going back to it.
Until tomorrow, same blog channel…
Scorp out!
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“This is Pavlo, our general handyman. He’s really ugly, isn’t he? Don’t be afraid to say so. Can’t understand you anyway, he speaks only Romanian. You see that gorgeous smile? He’s felt very handsome ever since he got those false teeth.” – Miss Tanner